Midwestern Adventure!

Corn Dogs at the Minnesota State Fair

Image via Wikipedia

So I am going to the Midwest on Saturday. Minneapolis to be specific. My sister lives there and since she has stayed with me in Seattle many a time I am going to return the favor. Jenny if you are reading this you best have some coffee in your house. Not drinking it yourself is not going to cut it as an excuse (who doesn’t drink coffee?? Blasphemy).

Anyway. The part of the visit I am probably most excited for, other than eating dinner here and I guess seeing my lovely sis, is the Minnesota State Fair. I LOVE me a good fair and I can only assume that Midwestern fairs are the pinnacle of fairdom. Greasy food, podunkers galore, janky rides assembled off the back of trucks, random craft projects, oh man I am getting excited about this but possibly the best part is that, as I found out when I ogled the schedule online today, the Minnesota State Fair has a special section set aside FOR NEWBORN FARM ANIMALS. DAH. Yeah they will probably all be eaten within a year but I will try not to focus on that.

MONORAIL!

Yay Monday! Yeah it isn’t really Monday but I work from home Monday which is amazing and leads Tuesday to feel like the real Monday since Monday was spent in my PJs on my couch talking to my dog. While working really hard too! Of course.

Anyway, a little weekend recap. The weekend’s highlight was probably happy hour hopping ON THE MONORAIL. I know, so glamorous and futuristic. I’ve lived in Seattle for like 6 years or something and had never experienced this relic. It was actually mildly thrilling at one point when the rail curves and the car sort of goes on its side. Yep. It was kind of janky but it didn’t crash or burst into flames as I believe it has been known to do on a couple occasions.

The actual happy hour part was sweet, too. Barolo has a delicious and amazing happy hour which is practically impossible to get into during the week unless you can get there at like 4 (and if you can I want your job). But, at 3:30 on a Saturday when my lush friends and I went, you can totally get in and then have two bottles of wine, hangar steak, rigatoni, fried calamari, grilled Caesar salad, and tuna tartare for a total of like 60 bucks. Amazing. Plus they have what is possibly the best-looking staff I have seen in any Seattle establishment if you are into the eye candy.

I will leave you with this.

Game Changer

The thing I want most in life is undeniably a magic carpet. I spend wayyyy too much time thinking about this which is depressing on many levels. But, the magic carpet would seriously be the most amazing invention of all time. Screw you penicillin, birth control pills, and the dishwasher. Why are we wasting valuable scientific brain power on cancer research when there is no magic carpet yet?  JUST THINK ABOUT IT. IT WILL BLOW YOUR MIND. No traffic jams and accompanying air pollution. No hideous bus commute to the hideous suburbs where I and many other innocent city dwellers have the misfortune to work. No standing downtown with bloody blisters on your feet and broken stilettos in your hands whilst simultaneously sobbing, texting, and fruitlessly attempting to hail a cab. Just try to think of a downside. THERE ISN’T ONE. It’s a MAGIC carpet, which negates any potential problems with the concept and also implies climate control, beverage options, and any other wondrous amenity one can conjure. It could have save J Lo’s 4th marriage or whatever number she was up to. Ugh this is hurting my brain. Happy Friday mofos.

Trashy Good Times

I LOVE trashy reality TV. There is almost nothing I won’t watch. Binge drinking in hot tubs? MORE. Hair extension-pulling feuds? Yes please. Plastic surgery makeovers from celebrity surgeons with questionable medical ethics? Bring it on. I must say I am brimming with excitement for two shows in particular this season. Jersey Shore and Russian Dolls.

Jersey Shore (which was filmed in Florence Italy this season! duh) has already kicked off and did not disappoint. Hot damn am I excited for some guido-continental culture clashing. And then there is Russian Dolls on Lifetime, premiering tomorrow. Television has found a new cultural stereotype to exploit, Russian-Americans! But seriously I sort of wish I was Russian-American with razor sharp Slavic cheekbones and an amazing accent and could get away with wearing an ankle length fur coat and leopard print pants. I hope this show is amazing.

10 Year Reunion Fun and Shopping FAIL

I have returned from my husband’s 10 year high school reunion unscathed.  There were two main freaky moments that stood out: 1. Some guy who said he worked for the boy scouts (chimo!) 2. Some chick wearing an all-denim romper. Interesting choice of attire…But other than these two incidents of awk, it wasn’t really that painful. My ten year reunion in AZ over Thanksgiving may be another story, stay tuned…

 Oh, and I broke my no-shopping resolution. TO BUY A ROMPER, OH THE IRONY. But it was (is) a $12 Forever 21 romper and NOT denim. And this went down in PDX so no sales tax, ha ha. So my little slip up wasn’t too egregious.

The Triumphant Return of Heidi!

Project Runway is back! Probably no one but me watches this anymore, I mean, Lifetime, really? Some friends and I used to convene weekly to eat fat lard treats and adopt horrible fake German accents while mocking the hot mess outfits and Heidi’s shenanigans, but they lost interest a couple seasons ago and left me all alone. Sad day.

This season looks promising though.  I’ve read about a couple intriguing guest judges though I am currently blanking on their names. Also, there is Bert! The oldest competitor ever and a recovering alcoholic who worked for some major fashion houses in the 70s but started hitting the bottle and hitting it hard after losing some friends to AIDS. I am totally team Bert, his dress rocked except for the bow but I can’t get behind bows of almost any sort in clothing. Anyway, go Bert and here’s to a new season!

Image courtesy College Candy

Am I insane?

I’ve made a major, earth shattering decision that will completely change the rest of my summer. No more shopping until Fall! Now that I type it, it doesn’t seem THAT insane since this is Seattle and fall will probably be here in about two weeks, not that winter/spring ever really left in the first place for more than a couple fleeting days at a time…

I DO tend to shop a lot though and in an attempt shared by my darling husband and I to actually start saving money for the first time in either of our lives, I am temporarily swearing off the shopping.  This will mean avoiding my typical shopping achilles heels: Zappos, Forever 21 (not linking, they are kind of evil after all), Bluefly, etc. etc. I also tend to read a BL of fashion blogs (shoutout to Man Repeller, my fave as of late) though they do tend to feature high end designer shizz I mostly can’t afford, anyway.

So the million dollar question is, does my recent discovery Rent the Runway count?? Rented this Herve Leger number for a wedding and while in retrospect it was maybe a bit hoochified for the occasion, I’m kind of obsessed:

Anyway, we shall see how this goes. Hopefully it makes fall shopping really purposeful and fun a la back to school shopping in days of yore.

Hello world!

Not feeling that fulfilled creatively by work, or life, really (assembling outfits from my 90% black, 90% Forever21 wardrobe doesn’t count), I’ve decided to start a blog just like my hero Michael K of the always glorious DListed. Most “social media experts” (GAG) will probably tell you blogs need a focus to be successful blah blah but I don’t feel like a very focused person most of the time so eff that. I also don’t have an easily identifiable passion or area of expertise I can expound upon (or maybe I’m just boring and shallow, hmm). I will attempt to unite my many interests into one messy blog, including exploring Seattle, shoes, food, music and general shit talking. Yep, this will most likely be a smattering of randomness that I will most likely abandon within a matter of months if not weeks, but I’ll give it a shot. HELLO BLOGGING WORLD.