Guess who’s back, back again.

Cool now I can look forward to Eminem running on repeat in my head during my weekly insomnia bouts.

I’ve neglected and then returned to blogging many times, so what’s one more?

Momming has been kicking my ass lately. The twins are almost two, a fact that I hope I don’t need to contextualize by bitching about how annoying almost-two-year-olds are, and how this is compounded beyond rational explanation when dealing with TWO almost-two-year-olds. And three and a half year old Avery, who was a (relative) delight at age two, has forced me to reassess my previous mockery of the term “threenager.”

Ugh. Shit is hard. It’s so hard it’s hard to explain how hard it is. I’m too exhausted to relive it in my mind so I just go blank when people ask probing questions about the specific difficulties inherent to parenting three children who can’t wipe their own asses.

Well fuck, I’ve been trying to think and to express myself more positively so my kids don’t grow into negative nancies like their mother, and based on the above you can probably guess how well that’s going. Stuff has also been really great in some ways!

I have three adorable (solid 5.5+ out of 10, each of them) and healthy*** children. My husband is pretty fucking great. And it’s basically summertime in Seattle. To the uninitiated, summer in Seattle is paradise. If Seattleites were lizard people who could soak up and then store the glory of Seattle summer to tap into during the unfortunate, dreary non-summer months, we would be so powerful we could take over the galaxy and enslave all lesser beings.

Anyway, summer in Seattle = 80 degree weather with low humidity. Crisp views of snow-capped peaks. Hella boats, everywhere. Because there are a lot of richies in Seattle and richies LOVE boats.

To conclude, I still have three kids, still live in Seattle, and still pay hosting fees to maintain a blog I rarely post to! Fucking fascinating.

***Constantly virus ridden and also Liam probably needs surgery to correct his associative esotropia/stabismus AKA HE’S CROSS EYED and the not insignificant effort I expended forcing him to wear his supposedly corrective lenses was pointless because said lenses did absolutely nothing

So our much loved and much needed nanny (hi Gabrielle! We really do love you please never leave us again) left town for a month. We survived intact!

To be transparent, it was a convenient month to be childcare free. Travel plans and a heavy rotation of visiting relatives chopped up the month nicely. But it was still fucking hard. Googling “typical schedule stay at home mom three under three” helped me feel a little less shitty about how stressed and antsy I sometimes became. And reassured me that not filling the days with enriching, age appropriate activities and excursions didn’t mean I was neglecting and depriving my offspring. The motherhood guilt is real.

The month is now a blur, but we definitely did a lot of stuff. Summer in Seattle things! We grilled a lot. I went on lots of walks and made lots of park trips. Those things are *somewhat* manageable while solo wrangling infant twins plus toddler. If you ever find yourself trapped at home alone losing your shit with three kids under three, and you live in Seattle, better hope it happens during summer.

Another thing we did: travel by plane with all three kids. This was fairly exhausting, and at times mildly terrible, but made manageable by the presence of my father in law, the duration of the flight to Salt Lake City (90 minutes), and my husband’s MVP status with Alaska Airlines, which is obviously our favorite airline because we like to remain predictable by fulfilling as many Seattle stereotypes as possible.

The trip went surprisingly well overall. My father in law’s new abode in Salt Lake City has a floatie equipped pool, which the kids loved. The weather was a delight; as a native Arizonan I am all about the dry heat. And Will and I got to sneak away for a couple dinners out (Red Iguana and Current Fish and Oyster. Both thoroughly enjoyable.) I also had my very first dueling piano bar experience. Weather, food and culture (and lots of international tourists…all LDS obviously)! Who needs Europe when you can go to Salt Lake City? Laugh/cry emoji.

Another key achievement from the previous month: taking all three kids wine wasting. Apologies, Kerloo Cellars. We felt so guilty foisting our children on their tasting room that we joined their wine club! I highly recommend wine tasting in the Sodo area of Seattle if you enjoy wine, whether or not you have to pound your pours because you brought kids and they are losing their shit. Lots of great tasting rooms in close proximity to each other, but much less overrun than Woodinville. In addition to Kerloo’s Sodo tasting room, I like Rotie, Nine Hats, Sleight of Hand, and even the ubiquitous Charles Smith (maybe don’t bring kids to that one though). If you get sick of wine, Schooner Exact Brewing has a full menu and a kids’ play area.

Well, summer in Seattle continues, only now it’s 1000% better because I have childcare and can sometimes escape my children. I see a lot of grilled food, many short lived lake trips (turns out crawling babies aren’t that fun to bring to the lake), and gallons of rosé in my future.

Happy Friday! My weekend plans include dinner with friends, a maternity photo shoot, and a sure to be ridiculous birthday party in the private room at Seattle institution Vito’s. We’ll see how long I can stay out. I should probably also do some baby prep things, other than laying on the couch and eating, that is.

A roundup of the best the internet had to offer this week (ok some are older, sorry not sorry):

1. To balance my Trader Joe’s post about delicious items, some not so delicious TJ’s offerings.
Everywhereist

2. This site is effing hilarious. Reductress

3. Definitely me when I’m old. The Cut

4. Football season is almost here, OMG! Amazing list of places to find Seahawks gear. Fresh Jess

5. Interesting photo series capturing lifestyles of the 1%. Refinery 29

Summer is here, and it is glorious. Actually it has been here for quite a while. Thanks climate change! Seattle’s typical June-uary gloom seems like it may be a phenomenon of the past. Though our farms are totally screwed for water we are doing way better than California, so we can be thankful for that at least (back off, William Shatner).

Below, a little roundup of activities to help maximize the delightfulness that is summer in the Pacific Northwest.

Drinks on a Patio
Get to a bar or restaurant with outdoor seating and order a beverage! And some oysters, fried seafood delights, or tacos. You’ll be joining like 45% of Seattle, so try to go at a less popular time (i.e. don’t roll through at 5pm on a Friday with 8 friends and expect to get a seat).

Westward, Little Water Cantina, Maximilien, and Terra Plata are a few of my favorites. Here is a nice little list if you need further inspiration.

Outdoor Music
There are so many good outdoor music options to be found in and around Seattle during summer. KEXP’s Concerts at the Mural series in August is FREE. Bumbershoot is a Seattle classic, though the lineup looks kind of random this year.

If you can deal with the hipster hordes, I highly recommend the Capitol Hill Block Party– if I wasn’t pregnant I would definitely be attending this year. For a slightly classier experience (I assume), I’ve been meaning to check out a concert at Chateau Ste. Michelle winery (two of my great loves, music and wine, in one place!) but I haven’t been so I can’t vouch for those.

Al Fresco Movie Night
If you’d rather remain in a reclined position while being entertained outdoors, hit up one of these.

Mariners Game
As a Seattleite you have to go to at least one Ms Game per summer, even if you think baseball is deadly boring. Safeco has great food options and beer/wine options galore. I don’t recommend trying to sneak in a flask on College Night-they will catch you and it will be embarrassing (not that I speak from experience…)

Find a Friend with a Boat
Ah the friend with a boat, so clutch. All of the fun with none of the cost or responsibility-it’s pretty much the perfect arrangement. Bring good snacks and booze and floaty toys and hopefully you will be asked back multiple times. Boating, in any format really, is the quintessential Seattle summer experience. Make it happen, even if you have to rent a canoe.

Stating the obvious: people are obsessed with pumpkin flavored shit. Have you seen the bounty of pumpkin options at Trader Joe’s as of late? The pumpkin toaster pastries admittedly tempt me but does the world really need pumpkin croutons? 

I jumped on the bandwagon like the basic-whitegirl-in-denial that I am and crafted a couple pumpkin drink options this week. Both were pretty good. Better than a Starbuck’s PSL which I think taste like soap.

 Pumpkin Coffee Drink* (PSL if you must)

Ingredients:

• Amount of coffee or espresso of your choice (I used about a cup of coffee)
• ½-1 cup dairy product of your choice (I used unsweetened almond milk)
• About ½ cup canned pumpkin (you could probably omit this-the spices are what bring the flavor. But I needed to get through the can of pumpkin I opened, YOLO, etc.)
• ½ tsp. vanilla extract
• Roughly ½ tsp. pumpkin spice OR roughly ½ tsp. cinnamon, ¼ tsp. nutmeg, small pinch ground cloves (I went this route and I eyeballed these amounts)
• Optional: sweetener (I used a stevia packet)

Heat the dairy and pumpkin on the stovetop or in the microwave, unless you want an iced drink. Stir in the seasonings to dissolve.

Combine with the coffee/espresso in a blender, or just stir/whisk together.

*Adapted from The Skinny Confidential

Pumpkin Smoothie

I breakfasted on smoothies all summer and am not quite ready to say goodbye yet. This provides a nice transition to oatmeal season.

Blend these together:

• ½ cup water or dairy (I used almond milk)
• ½ cup ish canned pumpkin
• Frozen, or non frozen, banana
• Generous amount cinnamon
• Optional: yogurt and/or raw cashews for more creaminess and protein